Article summary with Children's emotional development: Challenges in their relationships to parents, peers, and friends by Von Salisch - 2001

Why is emotional development in children researched?

Between the age of five and twelve, children undergo big developments on the emotional level. These developments have been marked as solitary and intrapsychic processes by researchers in the past. However, interpersonal aspects can not be ignored when investigating emotional development. This study aims to combine theoretical formulations and empirical findings in order to understand emotional development and challenges in the three most important interpersonal relations during preschool and primary school, the relation with parents, peers and friends. The study specifically investigates the role of these relations on the development of appraisal, experience, expression and emotion regulation. Each of the three important interpersonal relations will be discussed, as well as the structural characteristics of these relationships and their influence on emotional development.

What are the challenges in the relationship between children and their parents?

The relationship between children and their parents has a large impact on emotional development. Children and their parents are close to each other and spend a lot of time together. It is an asymmetrical relationship, as parents have more power than the child. Parents provide support and have a teaching role. The way the parents react to the child's distress determines their development of emotion regulation. A lack of response from the parents can have negative effects on emotion regulation. Furthermore, talking about other people's emotions has a positive effect on emotion understanding and moral sensitivity. When parents talk about feelings, children tend to have better regulation in the area of attention, appraisal and are better at expressing their emotions. An example of a structural limitation in this relationship is the difference in age. Some emotions of the child are not experienced by the parents, like being scared of monsters, and may therefore be disregarded

What are the challenges in peer relations?

The relationship between children and their peers is marked by symmetry, there are no power differences. The relationships are far less close than the one with parents for example, but still have a big impact on emotional development because they have the same age and understand each other better. They share similar emotions that are therefore validated and intensified when they are in a group. However, peer groups also have norms about the expression of emotions. Research has shown that children would only express anxiety or hurt in cases where it was very intense or visible from the outside. Showing negative emotions is generally not accepted in peer groups, and staying calm is the norm. The norms are reinforced by teasing, which often increases as the victim shows he is upset, gossiping about mistakes or blunders of other children, rejection, favouritism and outgroup hostality. A challenge that results from peer relations is overcoming the hurt of not being accepted by the group or chosen as favorite by others. Researchs shows that children tend to ignore emotions like sadness and anger in order to fit in.

What are the challenges in friendships?

Friendships often occur in the preadolescence and are marked by a higher level of intimacy than peer relations. Because friendships start to occur at a later age, they are often based on shared insecurities about changing bodies and new emotions. Friends help each other with advice about insecurities and emotions. Furthermore, friends offer each other distraction from negative emotions. Challenge originate in disagreements and conflicts. These challenges allow the preadolescents to learn how to deal with anger, resolve conflict and to build intimacy. Friendship also serves to learn how to deal with competition.